DON'T MISS ME TOO MUCH.

Oh, here's the photo you wanted, baby :) Take care in Armour. I'm darn proud of you - and darn proud of US too. Loveya.

Today was a very emotional day. OUR last day together before I fly and.. I cried buckets. It didn't help that he dragged his mom down to the florist in the morning to buy me the most GINORMOUS bouquet of flowers and totally surprised me when I went over to his place. TULIPS AND LILIES my two favourite flowers ohmygod..

Sigh darlingyy I know you'll only get to read this like two weeks later but I really appreciate everything these 4 months (and counting). I'm really so overwhelmed everytime I see and smell the flowers.. knowing that I can't look forward to weekends anymore cos you won't be around. Then two weeks later you'll be jetting over to Taiwan.. which really SUCKSBIGTIME sigh. I wanted to take photos today but my eyes were all puffy and red and I just looked a total mess so.. no photos. I'll always remember that last final hug outside your place (with your mom and your maid looking on haha) and it'll always be etched in my mind as I head over there. Really, no words can express. Loveyoulots.

Ah and this song couldn't be more apt, really.

And then there's THIS VERSE:

Firstly, there's the person who's been standing by me the past few months, being crappy, sharing my love for macs and good music. Been spending a lot of time with him and I'm really getting to know him better now. We have so much in common it's scary.. we even have the same house phone and use the same ringtone. O_O. Thanks, GUOFENG.

Date: Monday, 25th Sept
Flight No: SQ 322
Departure Time: 2320
Gate: Not confirmed
Terminal: 2
Destination: London - Heathrow
Duration: 13h 30 min
Arrival time: 0550 (1250 Singapore time)

I've been having problems sleeping lately. Last night I slept at a magnificent of time of 5am after watching Liverpool play Newcastle. I think I'm an insomniac or something. Hope tonight I'll be sleeping effortlessly.

Ahh anyway the game was ok. Not their best, but they won so I'm not really complaining. I like the look of this XI - with the exception of Agger being prefered over Hyypia - and Riise is really being missed. I think they were real lucky to get away with some dubious refereeing especially on Agger's part. His discipline is terrible, and there was one point that the commentator actually said something about "AGGER management" and "prevent any AGGERavation". WAHAHAHHAAHA.

Oh and of course there were the 2 goals which were sheer magic crafted by Alonso. He takes FULL credit for the fantastic goal from his own half that totally killed Newcastle's custodian, but I'm miffed about how everyone's going on and on about Alonso for the first goal. I mean, Steve Finnan has to be lauded too for launching a run all the way down the flanks and delivering that perfect cross. That's the thing about Finnan - NO ONE ever notices him despite how consistent and tough he is in the defence. Unsung hero indeed. He's my favourite player - if you haven't realised by now.

Ahh and there's that STUPID article in the Sunday Times that all IJ girls and alumni must deal with at this moment. Although it was tongue-in-cheek it was totally unecessary to besmirch the name of the school like that. For a paper that's read by so many Singaporeans (and not to mention IMF delegates) it was nothing but insensitive, distasteful, and a hopeless attempt at being funny. I'm NOT impressed. "Easy with the opposite sex"?? That is the most insulting thing I've heard anyone say about IJ girls. EASY - can you imagine the connotations? The IJ board is sueing, and I say well done. It's disappointing, considering that the Straits Times had done wonderful coverage on ex-IJ girl Elizabeth Choy. What an insult to her memory.

It's sorely lacking in content for now, and if you want access to the Private personal folder just ask me for the password. My email's there, just holler.

Today was a very fun day :) Went to the ZOO hoho. I've decided that sea lions and otters are the CUTEST creatures alive. I want a sea lion for my birthday. Warthogs are ugly.

I'm going to the zoo later.

And as the days slip by I'm getting more and more insomniac. The night is disarmingly beautiful. Right now the sky is like a greyishpink velvet blanket.

stop it, van, it's 2am. ah oh well I have the compulsion to stay up and watch night unfurl into day, taking photos of the process. I think I am artistically deprived. I need to buy film for my Holga. and M&Ms. Shall do all that tomorrow.

Tomorrow - Zoo.
Thursday - (Early) Lunch/Soupquest with Guofeng. Crashing NTU. Then Kino with Yining and Yinks.
Friday - Lunch with Cpt Aaron at CMPB. Dinner with Shiyin, Gina, Keni, Huimin
Saturday - Lunch with IJ 4/3 people. York Singsoc dinner
Sunday - Whole day with howe. Our last day together.

I need to activate my iCal. Pepper it with many coloured boxes. and amidst all this I need to pack my stuff. Ack.

Woke up today feeling very awful. Had cramps so curled up in bed with a big rubber hotwaterbottle :( Cancelled my facial. Gah. Maybe I'll go another day or something.

Packing is a real pain in the ass. It's not a matter of not enough space or baggage limit - I have 120kg since my parents are flying with me and we each can get upgraded to 40kg - but it's the problem of how to bloody carry everything. Plus we're gonna be touring London first and I don't wanna bring too many things I suppose. After all, I'm coming back in december. Then there's my MOM who buys like 2958963896 types of foodstuff for me to bring there I'm like wtffffff like there's no food in UK? grrtjsffsspfffbt.

Then there's the stupid thing called INSURANCE. Yes everyone's going on and on about how important it is... rainyday blahblah but honestly.. asking me to decide which company and which policies when I'm at a very nascent age of 18 comes up with nothing but a big fat blur. HOW am I supposed to make a decision when right now my biggest concern is getting firstclass or secondupper? Yeah - narrow-minded, I know, but honestly, it seems as if I'm being asked to grow up too fast and I'm not sure if I'm prepared for it.

I'm stressed :(

Live for today, we'll dream tomorrow.
We've got big plans in site.
We'll take this city, and by nightfall
the bright lights are calling.
Everything is going our way,
everything is just as we planned.
This is our future for what we've heard,
and its still got your hand.

And it feels like, we could last forever,
and im not doing this alone.

When memories fade, we've got eachother,
when time and confusion collide, singing
"I hold it all when I hold you." When friends
walk other ways, we've got eachother.
"I hold it all when I hold, I hold it all when I hold you."

You know, watching Liverpool's games will cause me to lose a lot of hair, or suffer a major coronary. JUST WHAT IS IT?? A CURSE? How can they have 10+ shots yet AGAIN and not score a single freaking G-O-A-L?? You know how frustrating it is when you try and try only to fluff it up at the very last nanosecond? That's the Anfield Story of late. Especially today at Chelsea. I was very very impressed at their fluidity, the team's ability to gel (particularly the strikepair of Bellamy-Kuyt) but no - there were no results!

Ah, and the Drogba goal. Chelsea fans and the commentators would probably gush "WHAT SKILL!!!", but as a Liverpool fan and a personal Drogba-hater, I would take the liberty to tweak that exclamation a little and say

HAIYARRR. Bobby Rubino's renovated and the standard of food seems to have been kinda compromised too. There isn't that OOMPH that I used to get when I was there previously on two or three other occasions with the family. Maybe it was because they took bakedbeans off the sidedishes list :(

Ahh but heck bobbyrubinos. AEP CLASS OF 2003! WHEE. It's really been 98393294728 years since we got together and amazingly the turnout was better than expected! YAY. Laughed till my sides ached - reliving IJ times, catching up, updating one another about who's-been-doing-what.. everything somehow seems so recent. Where did the 3 years go?

Then it was to the airport to send Jinping (my lifesupport) off to London. I'm really gonna miss seeing her everyday, going to "work" - as she puts it - together.. making fun of people together, grumbling/whining/complaining/getting bored together.. gosh MS NAH. I'm really really gonna miss you. Thanks for the photocollage and the letter :) The Angwei thing got me in stitches, seriously. loveya.

Today saw me going for a major pampering session. Manicure + Pedicure. Decided on a whim to paint my nails an alarmingly shocking shade of NEON PINK that I think Leepeng would be incredibly proud of. It contrasts nicely with my black macbook too. HAHA.

You see where it's chipped? Was doing up Davina's early birthday present. The food at her place was great, and it was a nice night with Howe too. Gosh. Imagine I'm leaving everything behind in a week. I kinda shudder at the thought.

You never looked so good
As you did lastnight
Underneath the city lights
There walking with your friend
Laughing at the moon
I swear you looked right through me
But I'm still livin' with your goodbye
And you're just goin' on with your life

How can you just walk on by
Without one tear in your eye
Don't you have the slightest feelings left for me
Maybe that's just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all

Faith Hill & Tim Mcgraw - Like We Never Loved At All

I'm SICK :( Been having a shitty flu and my lungs have been clogged up with phlegm that I'm paranoid that I'll choke. Ahh anyway after doctor's visit today I went to buy my stationery with mom and Alyssa. For some reason I kept grabbing all the pretty multicoloured files, pens and the like and I racked up a bill of $131.80. Oh someone help me. Got my debit statement recently and here's how it reads:

Which idiot spends $228.55 on FOOD in a span of 11 days? Granted, I got my money back on some of them since I paid for a whole group of people, but STILL. Here's me with my super long stationery receipt:

This is so embarrassing.

I really wish I could say welcome back Carra and Riise, but NO I can't. Firstly, they lost - with a horrendously humiliating scoreline of 3-0. Secondly, they lost a MERSEYSIDE DERBY. Thirdly, Riise got stretchered off again when Rafa used up all his subs so Pool played the last 15 mins with 10 men. Fourthly, Carra was solely to blame for Everton's 2nd goal.

I didn't catch the first half cos was at my sister's birthday dinner, but when I came home and saw the scoreline, I KNEW something must be wrong. Sure enough, their passing was uncontrolled and the players seemed sluggish. It was extremely telling cos at the end of the 1st half, they had TEN shots off target. They've always had the problem of creating chances but not finishing well, and I thought that's why they procured Kuyt from Feyenoord, but why oh why does Rafa leave him on the bench? Indeed, when Kuyt came on for Crouch (and why not sub Fowler, Rafa?) the game came alive. It's perplexing you know? Liverpool had ten corners but not a single one was converted to count in the score. HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE???

Ah and don't get me started on Reina's horrific howler on the 90+4 min. What was he thinking when he caught the ball and literally THREW it to Andy Johnson for him to knock into goal? As I watched every replay, I was just stunned because everything seemed too ludicrous to be true. ARRGHH I'm still really sore about the result. They've gotta be more consistent!

Besides the match, MEL take care in Chicago okay! lovelove. Two more weeks! :) Yay! I'm damn excited. But oh well today is a moody day and the match did nothing to improve my already very grouchymood. Gah. Tomorrow will be better - I hope.

Today was nice. Met up with Tom since like, forever. Dinner at Secret Recipe (my treat). The poor boy apparently felt very guilty about letting me treat him and he actually wanted to go to the FOODCOURT. Haha. Well, we've always got along pretty well but somehow, circumstances sorta forced us apart and I was incredibly sore about it. It amazes me, on retrospect, how much I've learnt to let go of things in my past, not bear grudges etcetc. Makes me a better person, I think.

Then there was a nice lunch before that, but shall not elaborate. NEXT WEEK IS MY LAST WEEK OF WORK! I've got 98928599285 outings and gatherings planned before I go abroad. I'm going crazy trying to fit everyone in. raaaargh.

HELLO LOVERS. I've changed my flight. Instead of 24th Sept, I'll be zooming off on 25th SEPT instead. It's a eleven-plus-at-night flight, so I'll prob be at the airport nine-ish. DO come and send me off okay! I wanna give everybody a beeeeg huggg. (: Gah I know it's a school night and all but hey I'm sure van is 8749697286836 times more important than your lectures and tutorials right? -beams-

Anyway, the weekend with him was painfully short, but oh well I guess we've just gotta make do. Our 4th month is coming up and I think we've really gotta plan something nice this time round cos we're gonna be so.. estranged sigh. There's this part of me that just can't leave everything behind, but yet there's another (tinier) part that's just itching to get on board the plane and start a New Life.

Oh yeah, RIP Crocodile Hunter :(

Was at the PSC seminar today helping out at the Mindef booth. This girl pissed me off, totally. If I weren't in uniform I'd have lashed out at her. SLUT. With arrogance like that and you wanna be a scholar? Go take your high and mighty nose and stuff it in the toilet thankyou.

Then met up with the aep people at Muthu's Curry to celebrate Lingee's birthday and for my "farewell" thingy. WAH haven't seen them in a gazillion years. It made me really miss art.. hearing how almost all of them are either in LaSalle or in NTU's ADM course, while I'm doing English and Politics.. well it feels really odd :( Suddenly, English and Politics sounds so pompous and so.. boring. I wanna do modules. ART MODULES. Printmaking, fine art, photog.. garrghhh.

I bought a new set of pencils and a sketchbook that day. Time to get down to work.