Jackson Pollock is a genius. I particularly enjoyed Art History today because we did Abstract Expressionism. Pollock, along with Mark Rothko - two of my most favourite artists. The way in which Pollock splashes paint onto the canvas is fantastic. It may look totally careless and haphazard, but it ISN'T. It takes a certain amount of control to pour just the right amount of paint at a particular point. It's.. just wow. Breathtaking. The sheer dynamism, texture and energy. WOW.
I guess there's this part of me that seriously yearns to let go, to not be bound by set standards. I'm not really the type who would go beyond boundaries and take risks. I prefer to play safe and just stick in my comfort zone. I had a talk with Mr Lee a few weeks back, and he told me that I was being too rigid. According to him, my technical competency is excellent, but I'm just happily finding limited satisfaction in reproducing drawings and more drawings. I'm becoming like a machine, and what I'm doing is not ART, but just.. a drawing. I admit, I find a sort of sick zeal when what I draw looks exactly like what I'm taking reference from, but seriously, that's IT.
I don't know how I'm gonna go about changing this. I'm kinda upset where my art is heading towards right now, knowing that I'm capable of so much more. I guess I gotta learn not to be so anal and to master the art of perspectivism, not be so narrow minded. Proactivity - that's what I seriously need. I need to indulge in the fleeting moments, liberate myself from the set constraints and go a step further. I need to DARE, to push myself to go where I've never thought I could go before. Maybe this will be at the expense of my other subjects, but I'm past really caring now. Art is my true calling. I may not get into it immediately after A Levels, but I definitely want to make it a career, sometime.
Vanessa Lim 12:21 p. m.
