when time and confusion collide

the name is vanessa but everybody calls me van. estranged ex-NJCanoeist of 2004/05 K2-500m. I'm a WSO (FIGHTER) trainee and I'm doing my BA(Hons) English and Politics in the University of York. I like fast cars, literature, art and tulips. I cannot cook. When I was younger I wanted to be an astronaut. I am hopeless at math or anything remotely related to formulae. I detest parsley. I love the colour burgundy. My Macbook is my bestfriend and I've played with Macs since I was 15 so no, I didn't jump on the bandwagon. I have lofty dreams but I'm often afraid to chase them. I don't get angry I get disappointed. I intend to learn Spanish and German. Oh, and I think Liverpool kicksmajorass - I am not a fair-weathered fan. I think ambiguity is beautiful.

DECEMBRE/DECIEMBRE/DECEMBRO
02 -- Thong's bday
05 -- Shumin's bday
07 -- Howeeeeee's bday
08 -- Daddy's bday
09 -- Commsparade!
11 -- Politics exam, snowball
14 -- MY bday!!
15 -- End of term!!!!!!!! To London.
17 -- 07
18 -- Flying home!
19 -- Touchdown 1855 SQ321
30 -- Back to London

Flickr Image Host
Photobucket Image Host
Dafont ALL my fonts
77words @ LJTextures/Patterns
Juvenile CasualtyBrushes
Lyrics by: The Fray

I think if I were alone somewhere, say on a beach. At the Esplanade. I could just burst into tears. I don't think I've felt so crap for a very very long time, and it's all because of you again. Everything. Fucking. Feels. Like. It's. Gonna. Collapse. Any moment now, I kinda expect the sky to cave in on me, or maybe a giant asteroid will hit Singapore and land in front of the com where I'm sitting now. Bye Van.

I hate being under someone's control, catering to someone's whims and fancies all the time. Subjugated to your every demand, but I can't help it. I'm like a bloody puppet, with you pulling the strings. (I love the Chinese word for puppet: kui2 lei3) Good grief I'm just not making any sense.

Make art, not war. Compose your songs of love. The Van Gogh complex. Noble Simplicity and Calm Grandeur. Pull a Seurat and dot your t's and cross the i's. Dada means hobby-horse. Draw something out of nonsense. nonsensenonsensenonsense. Surrealism. Freud and the dream. Romanticise. Death of Socrates! Battle of Mara! Liberty Leading the People! Composition IV. Music of the soul. Just paint.